Thoughts From The Bench - A Lazy Evening Diatribe

The Non-Negotiables: Moments We Will Never Miss

We're creatures of comfort.  We like our routines, traditions, and streaks.  We enjoy marking our calendars and looking forward to certain events or occasions that peak our interests.  We know what we like and we know how much it means to us.  As Walter Sobchak noted in The Big Lebowski, "Saturday, Donny, is Shabbos, the Jewish day of rest. That means that I don't work, I don't drive a car, I don't f----- ride in a car, I don't handle money, I don't turn on the oven, and I sure as s--- don't f----- roll!"  Walter was not only a Vietnam Vet, but also a brilliant man.

This weekend has been marked on our calendars for months.  The Masters is a permanent part of a sports fans routine.  We know it's the first week in April.  Always has been for 75 years and always will be.  It's a weekend you politely turn down wedding invites then immediately judge a couple that would schedule something on such a date.  By early April, especially in the south, the weather starts to turn the corner for the better and offers thoughts of fun and recreation outside.  Doesn't matter.  Unless I have tickets to Augusta National, I'm staying indoors to watch every shot played, no matter the favorable forecast.  The Masters is just one of many dates on a sports fans calendar that means more than just a chance to sit on a couch, eat some chips and dip and cheer for a team or individual...it's a non-negotiable commitment with a sense of moral obligation.

Politicians and pundits have their election dates.  They love the first Tuesday in November.  They look forward to primaries in places like Iowa and New Hampshire.  Designers and stylists alter their entire schedules around Fashion Weeks in cities like New York City and Paris.  Smelly hippies have blocked off their summer months for generations in order to follow around even smellier bands.  As sports fans, we're no different.  Possibly worse.

The first week in April is a prime example of how obligated the sports obsessed really are.  The Final Four is a non-negotiable, followed abruptly by The Masters.  It doesn't matter who is playing (i.e. VCU vs. Butler) or even the level of play (i.e. Butler's 18% from the field against UConn), I'm watching the semi-final games on Saturday night.  Dinner plans on the first Monday night in April?  Cancel them...that's the NCAA Finals.  The Beckwith-Cleary wedding on the first Saturday in April? Can't make it.  The free food, drinks and dance floor is tempting, but my couch, Amen Corner and The Masters theme song is better. The card and gift certificate is in the mail.  Besides, the green jacket is cooler than your tuxedo.

First week in January...college bowl season.  First Sunday in February...buffalo wings by the handful for The Super Bowl.  The entire month of March....pure Madness.  First weekend in April...a tradition like no other.  Camping trip during Labor Day weekend?  Sorry, that's the season opener for college football.  Need the leaves raked in late September?  Better hope it's an odd year and I'm not decked out in red, white, and blue for The Ryder Cup.  Second Saturday in December?  Army-Navy.  As for unknown dates, such as the NBA Finals, Stanley Cup, World Series and The Olympics, a sports nutcase learns how to adjust and overcome on a moment's notice...but the dedication and commitment is still unwavering. 

Is this selfish?  Slightly.  There is a bit of annoyance with any group of people that refuse to alter schedules for something others don't necessarily have the same level of appreciation for.  Can compromises be made?  Depends.  We're willing to give up a Game 2 or 3 between two teams we're not directly attached to, but a possible Game 7 is non-negotiable, as history will be made by someone or some team.  I need to see that last championship clinching pitch, jumper, or power-play.  I feed off of the reactions and emotions shown by both the winners and losers. 

True sports fans can remember Bob Costas trying to interview a weeping and unresponsive Michael Jordan after his first title in '91.  Fans know where they were when Aaron Boone pulled a Bucky Dent on the BoSox in '03, but also how neat that last out against St. Louis was when they finally broke that 86 year drought in '04.  I need to hear what cheesy catch phrase Jim Nantz is going to pronounce as the buzzer sounds.  I need to take in the authentic excitement a Reggie Miller, having been pulled away from his usual NBA duties to cover his first March Madness, exudes next to an already ecstatic Gus Johnson during the an Elite Eight overtime.  These are the sights and sounds that true sports fans keep lodged in their memories.  Sometimes the actual final score doesn't even matter, especially when you're from Cleveland.

In this day and age with phone apps, DVR, numerous ESPN channels, YouTube and countless websites with articles and videos, one doesn't really even need to watch the actual event in real time to stay up to date and knowledgeable.  That's not the issue though.  It's not about being able to be apart of the "good guys" at work and talking sports around the water cooler.  It runs deeper than that.  It's about feeling your television shake when the Cameron Crazies get even a bit crazier once a year when the Tar Heels drive down the road.  It's about knowing the very weekend your favorite college team plays their arch rival.  It's about saying "I was there when"...or "I remember where I was when..." It's about catching snippets of emotions, leadership, fatigue, swagger, or heartbreak that a casual fan doesn't even see that will be etched in your mind forever.  It's about tradition, loyal, and intrigue.  Most of all, it's about obsession.