Thoughts From The Bench - A Lazy Evening Diatribe

Starting Line-Ups and Becketts: The Evolution of a Sports Crazed Youth

Last Thursday the NBA Draft took place.  I was especially interested in this draft because I'm from Cleveland and a lifelong Cavaliers fan, the embarrassed and betrayed organization that was "given" the first and fourth picks.  Leading up to the draft I did some research on who the stars of the draft were and what the Cavs were thinking about doing with such a unique draft situation.  I followed their front office and the local beat writers on Twitter.  When the time came, it was no surprise they took Kyrie Irving with the first pick. Even though he played about as many games this year during his lone season at Duke as Rudy dressed for at Notre Dame, the general sporting public has known about him all year long, just as we knew about the Timberwolves pick of Derrick Williams at number two. 

Then the draft just got hazy.  The Jazz selected a guy I had never heard of two weeks ago.  My own Cavs took a power forward from Canada who played one year at Texas that I had never heard of this whole college basketball season.  Picks five, six, and seven sounded like international interns at the United Nations....Jonas Valanciunas, Jan Vesely, and Bismack Biyombo.  As the picks proceeded to get even stranger and more unrecognizable, I started to think back at the drafts I grew up watching and how interested I was in each pick.  Then I started wondering, based off of how much college and international basketball has change in the last ten years, if kids even follow the draft anymore.  I then started to think about the vast differences between what interested my friends and I about sports as kids and teenagers compared to what might interest the current generation.  Whether it was trading baseball cards, showcasing Starting Line-Ups in our rooms, researching card prices in Beckett's or writing handwritten letters to our favorite team's front offices in hopes of an athlete's autograph, the state of a sports crazed kid/teenager has changed more in the last 10 years than ever before.

Look at the first ten picks of the 1992 NBA Draft...

1) Shaquille O'Neal - Junior
2) Alonzo Mourning - Senior
3) Christian Laettner - Senior
4) Jimmy Jackson - Junior
5) LaPhonso Ellis - Senior
6) Tom Gugliotta - Senior
7) Walt Williams - Senior
8) Todd Day - Senior
9) Clarence Weatherspoon -Senior
10) Adam Keefe - Senior

There were eight seniors taken in the first ten picks; the only other two were juniors.  These college stars became household names before they ever put on a NBA jersey.  Laettner was even a gold medalist with the Dream Team before ever arriving in Minnesota.  Other names in the first round included Robert Horry, Harold Miner, Anthony Peeler, Doug Christie, Hubert Davis, Jon Berry, and Latrell Sprewell.  I still remember where each of these players went to college and can even remember certain games they played and famous highlights during their collegiate careers.  Compare that to having never heard of my favorite team's pick at number four until about a week before the draft.  Much of the magic in events like the NBA draft is gone, which makes me wonder about the generation of sports fans that are growing up right now.

I treated each Beckett, a monthly publication that priced all trading cards, like a priest treats his bible.  I knew exactly how much each card was worth.  I knew what trades I could get away with on other friends in an effort to improve my collection.  I regularly visited the local card shops researching prospective cards, only to collect enough money up to ride my bike to the card store to make such a significant financial commitment, with the same emotional connection and interest as a young couple picking out their first house.  Do kids even buy, collect and trade cards anymore?  I just had to Google "Beckett Magazine" to see if they are even in business anymore.  They are, but I wonder if anyone even buys them anymore; might as well just Google the price of your cards.

I remember planning my entire Saturday mornings around making sure I caught Ahmad Rashad host the weekly installment of NBA Inside Stuff on NBC.  To this day I still have VHS's tucked away that have special events such as the Dream Team's gold medal game and ceremony from 1992, Notre Dame games taped on NBC, and "Pistol" Pete Maravich instructional videos.  What do kids nowadays do...just DVR and YouTube all of the great moments of their youth?  My walls were line with posters and pennants, items I still have to this day.  Do they even sell cool posters anymore? I'm nearly positive you can't go down to the local sports equipment shop and pick up an Aaron Rodgers cartoon pennant.

If the changes in following sports for kids has really changed as much as I assume it has, I'm glad I grew up before the internet, YouTube, iPhone apps and over-the-top video games with headsets connected to creepy strangers in Shanghai.  I'm glad I treated my Dominique Wilkins card collection as serious as I treat my current 401K.  I'm glad I had to run out to the the mailbox to see if a letter came back from the Cleveland Browns front office with a Bernie Kosar autograph instead of simply emailing them from an iPad.  Things were simple for the paperboys admiring Babe Ruth in the 1920's, and just as simple for kids playing stick ball in the streets during the 1940's,  1950's and 1960's, when pretending they were Ted Williams, Joe DiMaggio, or Mickey Mantle .  It wasn't very complicated in the 1970's, 1980's and 1990's when keeping an All-Star's rookie card hidden in your sock drawer had the same secrecy as a CIA agent hiding his extra passports.  Unfortunately, things are much more diluted nowadays.  The convenience and overwhelming fascination with technology has improved things for the entrepreneur, Wall Street investor and world traveler, but has taken away some of the innocence I remember from my childhood obsessing about sports figures, statistics, and collectibles.  Besides, if kids aren't collecting cards anymore, who am I ever going to trick into trading for my Jose Canseco Topps rookie?

Submission of the Day

From J.P.F., one of our favorite followers and a member of one of our favorite bands that is still coming together after nearly a decade of rehearsals, Sloppy Tuna, comes this nice observation...

"I just saw an advertisement that BMW is the official car sponsor of the US Olympic team...  I appreciate a sharp, reliable car as much as the next guy.  I just purchased, with very little guilt, a Honda Accord, something several of our Grandfathers would have scoffed at...Still, for a number of reasons, it saddened me a little.  I also couldn't help but wonder how many people INSTANTLY, as I did, raised an eyebrow at the overwhelming irony of the sponsorship- that the cornerstone of German engineering, that once fueled the German war machine, whose corporate symbol gives homage to its history as a manufacturer of the prop-engines that (I assume) roared over both our boys, and the streets of our allies emerald cities, now sponsors our Olympic program- what was once perhaps the premier symbol of our national power and identity.  I also couldn't help but instantly think of two names- Adolf Hitler and Jesse Owens."

Del Potro does The Bomber

Hilarious stuff from Wimbledon, which is a rare comment to say about a place that requires everyone to wear all white and is located in England.  Argentinean Juan Martin Del Potro reenacted a classic scene from The Royal Tenenbaums at Wimbledon.  I can't make this stuff up.  Instead, I'll let you compare the temper tantrums...

Episode #1: Juan Martin Del Potro at Wimbledon

Episode #2: Richie "The Bomber" Tenenbaum at Windswept Fields

Cover of the Day

Very cool cover this week from Sports Illustrated...

Choir Boys

Interesting read in The Wall Street Journal about the few schools who have actually played by the NCAA's rules. 

According to the NCAA, there are 17 schools with major athletic departments (whose football teams compete in the Football Bowl Subdivision) that have never been found guilty of any major violation in any sport since 1953, when the NCAA began tracking rule violations. That's about 14% of the total.

There are only four athletic programs from major conferences on the list. They are Boston College, Northwestern, Penn State and Stanford.

Excruciating Pain

Fantastic SportsCenter commercial out right now. 

If you're a huge soccer fan and take offense to this commercial or try to defend this part of the game, you're the exact reason why soccer has never really taken off in America.  We love hard hits in football, posterizing dunks in basketball, huge home runs in baseball and aggressive checks against the boards in hockey.  We love BBQ ribs, cold beers and loud music.  We don't like athletes faking injuries.  Basketball players may "flop" for charges, but they get up right away without making a scene.  Football and hockey?  Don't even compare...those guys are getting concussions and having a hard time even walking after retiring.

Until that part of the game goes away or soccer can even admit it's a stupid part of the game, I'll continue to watch The Office reruns on TBS instead of any MLS game on ESPN.

Double Down.

"A member of the golf club in McIlroy’s hometown of Holywood won 25,000 pounds on Sunday after he bet 50 pounds at 500-1 odds that McIlroy would win a major before turning 25.
Gerry McIlroy, Rory’s father, may be the next to hit the jackpot. According to reports, the elder McIlroy and a few friends each bet 100 pounds at 500-1 odds that Rory would win the British Open before the age of 25. McIlroy will have three opportunities to win the Open Championship before he turns 25 and land his father a payday."

Athletes On Gay Marriage

New York Daily News compiled a list of quotes from athletes and sports personalities commenting on the issue of gay marriage. We don't do politics at GM, just wanted to post the link to reinforce the fact that athletes are morons, by and large. Why does anyone listen to these people? Stay in your lane. Just hit home runs and shut up. (Wow, Smoltzy. Wow.)

Morning Wood: Your Wednesday Links

Looking good, TB. Looking good.

- Deceased E-Street band member Clarence Clemons went 4 for 5 at his own funeral. That's right. 4 of his 5 wives showed up to pay tribute. Respect.

- Cubs catcher Geovany Soto with one of the best reactions of the year after Ozzie Guillen booted his catchers mask across the diamond.

- Ricky Rubio is finally coming to the NBA, even though he sucked in Europe. T-Wolves using his number for ticket promotion anyway:

- Trip to Dodgers game becoming stranger and more surreal by the day. Pic from last night's game. Imagine what it would have looked like if there wasn't a free towel giveaway:

- Apparently there are still some schools out there without major NCAA allegations/violations. Congrats, I guess, to Boston College, Northwestern, Penn State and Stanford.

- This is what happens when you are employed by a classy organization and start sleeping with your teammates' wives. Good luck in Sacramento, Tony.

- Pictograph of how, exactly, the Boston Bruins racked up a $156,679.74 bar tab at a Foxwoods casino night club.

- The Rory/Tiger comparisons are ridiculous, but they do have this one thing in common. Child prodigy TV appearances:

Hooah.

Taking a quick break from sports this morning to give a solid shout out to Captain Brian Kalaher and his boys in Kunar Province, Afghanistan.  Badass work, Brian.  Be safe and everyone here at the Garbage Minutes Headquarters are thinking about you guys.

Here is a great write up featured in USAToday about their recent work.

How difficult is Kunar Province?  See for yourself from the documentary Restrepo. 

We'll get back to commentating on minor human interest stories in the world of sports, but use this post as a reminder that "heroes" like LeBron, Tiger, A-Rod, and Brady are just entertainers, not defenders of freedom.

Math Class

Very interesting work from Bill Barnwell on grantland.com about Rory's performance over the last four days.  Main take-aways...

- Tiger's 2000 U.S. Open gets more and more impressive with each year.  ESPN Classic should put that on at least once a month to remind us of his greatness, especially now that some are questioning it.
- Tiger and Jack are both on this list three times.  Goes to show how much better those two guys were/are than their respective competition.
- How brutal was the 2008 British Open?  Paddy Harrington has a Z-score of 3.09 against the field yet finishes at +3.  Unreal.

Tweet of the Tournament

The Garbage Minute Guys weren't the only ones that thought Y.E. Yang's final round outfit was hideous.  Hilarious tweet below from college basketball guru Jay Bilas...

Delicious

From Rory McIlroy's Twitter account...

Vancouver Tourism Video

And this city was just on showcase to the world while hosting the Winter Olympics?  Lucky for them they actually beat the Americans in overtime for the Gold Medal, because they showed their true colors last night.  Thought this stuff only happened around Columbus after a Buckeyes loss.

Solid Tweet from Vancouver resident Steve Nash...

Business Trip.

One of the Garbage Minute Guys found himself in Philadelphia for business the other night.  What kind of business?  Don't worry about it.  Here are his observations after catching a Phillies game.  Notice this grown adult flew on this business trip with a baseball glove in hopes of catching his second official MLB foul ball.  He didn't.

Works Cited: Garbage Minutes Twitter account.

U-S-A

That's right. I'm shamelessly pulling everyone I can onto the Bruins bandwagon for game 7 tonight by appealing to their patriotism. A win for the spoked Bs is a win for America. And please don't bog my email down with facts showing there are more American players on Vancouver than the Bruins. That is beside the point. Cheering against the flopping, whining Canucks is just like cheering against the Heat only imagine Miami is in a foreign country. (Like Cuba, for example) God bless America and go B's.

Chills City.

File this video under reason #21,475 we love sports. The Garden Monday night giving injured star Nathan Horton, taken out of the series by a cheap shot from Canuck Aaron Rome, a standing ovation.

"All the people that were rooting on me to fail, at the end of the day they have to wake up tomorrow and have the same life that they had before they woke up today. They have the same personal problems they had today. I'm going to continue to live the way I want to live and continue to do the things that I want to do with me and my family and be happy with that. So they can get a few days or a few months or whatever the case may be on being happy about not only myself, but the Miami Heat not accomplishing their goal. But they got to get back to the real world at some point."

Great piece by longtime Cleveland beat writer Terry Pluto.

Sweet Bills

Easily the worst champions hats ever.  Look at these bills.  That's the best you could do, NBA?  If I were a starving 6 year old in Honduras, I wouldn't even want a version of the 2011 NBA Champions Miami Heat hat given to me in about a week by some American non-profit volunteer.

Sweet Tweets

Some great Twitter entries in response to last night...

Mo Williams, former Cavalier

Michael Wilbon, ESPN

Dan Gilbert, Cavs Owner

Tony Grossi, Cleveland Beat Writer

Adam Schefter, ESPN

Magic Johnson, 5 Time NBA Champion

Esquire Magazine

Piling On.

This may be piling on but I can't help myself. If they never win one as a team this video is going to haunt them for the rest of their lives. I promise to post this every year the day after the Heat are eliminated from the playoffs. Pure gold.

Thank You, Dirk

The Dallas Mavericks are NBA champs. Thank god. I feel like everything we believe about the game of basketball and team sports in general has been vindicated. Cue the Bosh trade rumors. Cool picture of Mavs owner Mark Cuban bringing the Larry O'Brien trophy with him to a nightclub last night. Have to feel great for Dirk and J-Kidd. Congrats and thank you from a grateful nation.

The Daily Throwback 6/10/11

Today's amazing sports poster of all time great linebacker and statutory rape specialist Lawrence Taylor is brought to you by the 80's. If I had grown up a Giants fan I guarantee I would have had this gem hanging in my room. Lasers coming out of his hands? Yes, Please.

Commercials

The NBA Finals is once again taking up the majority of the sports news right now, even though there is another great series taking place on the ice.  Basketball will always beat out hockey in the states, but not with commercials.  Want to get your fan base pumped up for a playoff stretch?  Don't be the NBA and offer some lame commercials with a basketball talking or tie in with Hollywood and showcase a very un-funny actor like Kevin James promoting a new movie that will be just as un-funny as him.  It's actually a pretty easy solution.  Show great old footage.  You have the rights to all the footage...it's down in your vault.  Go grab some tapes and put together commercials like these.  Best one?  "No words"  by far.

- "No Words" - NHL 2011
- "Mess" - History Will Be Made
- "The Moment They Live For" - NHL 2010
- "Bobby Orr" - NHL 2010
- "Wish" - History Will Be Made
- Playoff Promo from CBC - 2011

We're Hiring

Interesting read from the Wall Street Journal about the evolution and current state of sports writers.  For all of those writers that feel as though their jobs are in jeopardy, know that Garbage Minutes has some openings.  You'll start as our valet service, work your way up to stocking our vending machines with enough Beef Jerky and Mountain Dew to feed the Raiders offensive line, then possibly be selected to work in the Garbage Minutes barber shop here at the headquarters, where you'll be responsible for maintaining our mustaches and sideburns, and then you might have the opportunity to post a story or two on our blog.  Please leave your application in the lobby, just in case we need to use it for tax purposes.

Speaking of journalists in and around the locker room, here is one of our favorites. 

Trophy Licking Contest

From possibly the best writer...both sports and culture, Steve Rushin.   He's the Bill Bryson of sports.  Never heard of him?  Start reading his book, columns and tweets.  Best book?  Road Swing...basically takes a year off and road trips around America checking out every hot spot for sports enthusiasts, to include the real Field of Dreams in Iowa.

GO MAVS!

Well done last night, Dallas.  You have the entire weight of every fan outside of the 305 area code on your shoulders.  Besides a few well tanned metros and some cougars with expensive purses and fake body parts who only show up to playoff games pretending to be life-long Heat fans, America is hoping for two more Mavericks wins.  Enjoy this support Dallas, because it won't be the case if football ever resumes, as we grew sick of Jerry Jones, Tony Romo, and the rest of the annoying baggage your Cowboys bring years ago.  Basically the Heat of the NFL.

Joke.

Terrell Pryor has completely taken a crap on the NCAA, as well as the state of Arkansas.  Has anyone in recent history been more of a joke for amateur sports?  Hey Buckeyes fans, hope you really enjoyed your three years of Pryor, as he's officially done more damage than he ever did good for you.  Hope you really enjoyed that Rose Bowl win over Oregon and Sugar Bowl win over Arkansas, because now your black eye is even getting darker and more bruised. 

Remember when Pryor "promised" old Sweater Vest he would come back for his senior year if he was allowed to play in the Sugar Bowl?  Then he went on to help beat Arkansas in a thriller in New Orleans...only to pull this slick move months later. 

Here's to Pryor being taken at the bottom of the supplemental draft and eventually playing tight end in arena football...or sipping on some purple drank at JaMarcus Russell's crib.

Lastly, to all the Buckeyes fans that think "everyone is out to get them" or "every program is doing this stuff...we're just getting investigated," make no mistake, you're now officially viewed in the same light as 80's SMU, 80's Miami, 90's FSU and 00's USC.  Low standards and low class.

GM On Twitter

Follow @garbageminutes

Anthony Weiner has inspired us. 

Just what you needed. More semi-coherent sports commentary directly from the horses (ass) mouth at GM world headquarters. If you're on twitter, give us a follow, and we promise even more wasted time in your cubicle.

DISCLAIMER: Please disregard all tweets made during prime drinking hours which are 5:00 PM and 6:00 AM during the week and midnight on friday until 6 AM Monday morning. Also disregard tweets sent out during or immediately following Boston and Cleveland sports team losses. Just assume we don't actually want Lebron dead - someone hacked our account.

You're Welcome, France.

Today we celebrate the 67th anniversary of one of the greatest military operations in American history...D-Day.  We honor all of those brave men that either stormed or dropped into the beaches bordering France.  This country will forever be in debt to those gutsy men, one of which was legendary Yankees catcher Yogi Berra.

Imagine receiving this message from General Dwight D. Eisenhower on the morning of June 6, 1944...

Take seven minutes out of your evening tonight and watch this to gain an even greater appreciation.

Dykstra Watch: Grand Theft Auto Edition

Garbage Minutes mainstay Lenny Dykstra is at it again. Grand theft auto this time. And drug possession. Probably not as bad as it sounds, right? Probably just a little medicinal marijuana or something?

Oh, they found cocaine, ecstacy and synthetic HGH in the stolen car? Hmm. That doesn't sound like my boy Lenny. Looks like a frame job to me. Like Newman claiming Keith Hernandez spit on him.

The Daily Throwback 6/6/2011

Today we honor the Reebok Pump.  You know you remember these...you might have even owned a pair.

Enjoy some of the old commericals and footage...

Better Eat Your Wheaties

Recent observation at the grocery store.  Who the hell is this on the cover of the Wheaties box? 

Since when can just anyone grace the cover of the whole grain classic?  We have nothing but respect for the Ironman champ, but that's not going to get me to buy Wheaties.  The Garbage Minute Guys grew up collecting Wheaties boxes because Jordan, Walter Payton, and Bird told us to make our moms buy the cereal...not some skinny dude we've never heard of.  I would rather be on the cover of that lame box of Great Value knock off flakes.  Due to this fall from marketing grace, Wheaties has given us no choice but to stock our kitchen with Lucky Charms here at the Garbage Minutes World Headquarters in Cork, Ireland.

Where's the old Wheaties marketing magic?

Submission of the Day

Thanks to John in Ohio for this submission.  He recently attended a Lake County Captains ball game and wrote the following...

"God Bless Single-A baseball and the $2 souvenir cup upgrade.  Best value in the minors.  It's glass too."

Free Man

Plax is getting out of jail tomorrow. Seems like he went to jail twenty years ago. I still don't understand why they needed to punish him any more than he already punished himself after shooting himself in the leg but I guess New York had nothing else to do with it's taxpayer dollars than put someone away who actually pays a substantial amount of taxes and contributes to society.

I'm hoping the Eagles sign him. Would love to see what kind of CONnection he and Mike Vick would have. See what I did there? Sorry about that. I got nothing.

GM Idiot of the Week: Brian Sabean

It has been nearly eleven days since Marlins rookie Scott Cousins bowled over Giants catcher Buster Posey at home plate, breaking Posey's leg and ending his season, yet here we are still talking about it. Immediately following the collision, the national sports media engaged in a nation wide debate over whether there should be new rules to protect catchers. No matter what side of the debate you fall on, the bottom line is no one would be having this debate if it were some back up catcher (pick one of the Molina brothers) and not the defending World Series champions' all star catcher and clean up hitter had been injured while blocking the plate.

An SI article then brought to light that Scott Cousins, a San Francisco native, has been receiving death threats. Instead of donig the classy thing and releasing a statement saying that although the outcome of the play was unfortunate, it was a clean play and part of the game, fat ass Giants GM Brian Sabean made the following comments on a local San Francisco radio station. Keep in mind he already knew that Cousins had been receiving death threats:

“If I never hear from Cousins again or he never plays another game in the big leagues, I think we’ll all be happy.”

“He chose to be a hero in my mind, and if that’s his flash of fame, that’s as good as it’s going to get, pal. We’ll have a long memory. Believe me, we’ve talked to (former catcher Mike) Matheny about how this game works. You can’t be that out-and-out overly aggressive. I’ll put it as politically as I can state it: There’s no love lost and there shouldn’t be.”

The Giants organization backed off of their comments immediately, of course, and Sabean now has a date with MLB discipline czar Joe Torrey at a yet to be determined date.

Even hinting at violence is poor judgement from an organization that had one of its fans nearly beaten to death in LA on opening day. It appears Sabean thinks the Giants World Series victory has given him enough leverage to make ignorant, moronic comments without consequence. This is the same guy, by the way, that gave Barry Bonds free reign to behave however he wanted and signed Barry Zito to a $126 M contract through 2014. If I were a Giants fan, I think I would be concerned that my General Manager is still talking about something that happened eleven days ago and not looking toward the future in a very winnable division.

Brian Sabean. GM idiot of the week.

The Dugout: Cool Places with a Touch of Sports

Today's Feature: Watkins Shoe Shop in Raleigh, North Carolina.

Today I stopped in to the Watkins Shoe Shop on West Peace Street in downtown Raleigh.  I've walked past it numerous times before and admired the vintage Michael Jordan posters aligning the walls. I spoke with Reggie, the proud son of the store's founder, Willie Watkins, Jr.  Reggie explained his father respected the Wilmington, NC native and UNC Tarheel for his "ability to rise to the top and excel", therefore he covered his walls with classic Jordan prints from the 80's and early 90's (no Wizards posters!).

Willie Watkins Jr. was born in 1926, started shining shoes at the age of 13, enlisted in the Navy and eventually made his way back to North Carolina where he opened his own shoe store.  He passed away several years ago but his children, Elaine, Derrick and Reggie have kept the family tradition going.  He always instructed them to "do something with your life".

Reggie was well versed in the current happenings in basketball, in both conversation and with the noticeable Sports Illustrated's strewn about the store.  We talked about Jordan and LeBron.  We talked about the different posters and images on the wall.  It's a nice place with even nicer people working inside.  Thanks to Reggie for his hospitality and the next time you're in Raleigh and need a shoe repair, stop in and enjoy some of the scenery shown below.